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September 14 Anxiety,anxiety,anxiety:(I even can not remeber when I was so anxious last time.
Feel like all many passion, self-confidence, and courage have gone to other place.
It's nature of human being to fear about unknown.
I try to inmagine what would happen tomorrow when I am doing presentation,
but the more I think, the more I feel freezing.
Even more anxious than about the exam. One day in BrightonI always wish I can have more interview opportunities, but I never hope all of them come together. After a short rest on Tuesday, I aheaded to Brighton this morning. Brighton is more lovely than I expected, i didn't know it is a coastal city. The first impression when I arrived there was it is another Bournemouth, cute and lovely, even the buildings are all in the same style. Maybe all the sea side cities are built following the same architecture. One thing I need to add is that girls in Brighton are very pretty as well, especially in the summer wearing. It is a pitty some guys haven't been there before.
I need to blame the bus driver here. As an old lady on the bus said, he is stupid. I asked him to tell me when we arrived the place, but he...
It only takes me less than 10 minutes from the Hove station to the interview place, but I spent near another hour walking back from the place i got off from the bus. The driver needs to feel lucky, if I was not in a good mood that time, I would call to complain about the issue without hezitation. But thanks to his stupidness and rudeness, I have a chance to view the nice sight in Brighton.
It is true that most of computer geeks are not good at talking, I found the interviewer seem to be more shy than me. haha, feel good and confident about that. When he introduced his company to me, I felt like our places were switched. Dude, what the hell you nervous about. I have to say that sometimes, we need to insist our benefit. After I interviewed with one technical person, i asked him if I could get refund for my train ticket, he told me quitely that it was not possible. Fairly enough, as I did not ask them in advance, but I don't want to lose £19 pounds like that. Lucky enough, there is another samll interview with the director of company and the leader of tech team. Honestly, I was a bit offensive at the beginning for the meanness of the company. But those two people are nice and they are at similar age at me. I have to say they are good, every IT graduate dreams to start their companies, but few can succeed. Aftrer the interview, I asked them again about the ticket. Yes, they said. That's good, although it was slightly wierd when the first interviewer gave me the check. But not my fault, waste is one of the sin, haha.
Again, I fell sleep on the way home. God bless me I can find a good job soon, I can't keep travelling day after day for interview, I am totally exhaulsted now. September 13 One day in London, and a busy weekIt sucks when several things bad come togeter. However, it won't make much better that some good things happen at the same time.
After long time waiting for no response, finally i got some opportunities, and, of course, feel more than glad to take them. But, but, they make
my life rather tough this week. Before my potential career starts (who knows what i will do as my first career), I will experience some busy, fast pace professional days.
Leaving in the early morning on Monday, and went to London to extend passport( time has gone so fast, my 5-year valid passport runs to the last one tenth, and, gladly, many good changes happened to me). Leaving the China embassy was not the end of yesterday, as I went directly to find my interview place. Thanks to my good organization and calculating, I get someone help me pay the train tickets to London. And, of course, this is my main purpose to London, the interview. As Ellery commented, maybe there is some chemistry between me and the interviewer. From the first question, we made it to be a chat rather than a stuborn interview. And, unitil now, I just noticed how silly and careless was I. I saw the headline, 9.11 the world remeber you, several times, but did not get any clue why it was in the most noticeable place in newspaper. Yes, it was 11, sep yesterday. I feel really proud that I can talk with a senior consultant and one of my potential manager if i am employed so comfortablly. Before went to the interview, i was a bit nervous, and as a result i went to starbucks to have some coffee. The feeling is so great to have coffee and reading company introduction there. I felt I was like a professional and reading statistics, and this is what i am looking forward to. Overall, i would like mark 90% for my performance, as I consider i did pretty well in that hour. And feel so great to be invited to the assessment interview on Friday, for which the decision is made on my performance yesterday.
After the interview, I walked in the city of London. I haven't been to New York, but I am sure, the place i was in is the Wall Street in London. This is the heart of the European Economy centre. Every building hold some big or even huge names.
I was totally exhaust after the interview and travelling, and fell sleep on the way home. en,sleeping on transport is one thing i like doing and always do.
Tuesday, a good friend, Ellery went back to his country, left with kind of regret. But as he is a tough person, there's no doubt he can find a good job easily in his own place.
Wednesday, is another opportunity, challenge and battle. Cross fingers i can survie, no, prefer saying i can convince the interviewer. Friday is more important. I feel I've changed much. Before, I may ask for extention, since the two interviews are so close, just 4 days, and I need at least to recover. But, now I know, this is real life, which campus can't even compare with. And now, I have the confidence of my most important product, I know it is good. When I can become a good salesman, definitely, I can sell it at a very high price.
Ps:
Something has passed, I will let it go, feel much better now. I think I've come out of the down feeling last week.
September 02 淡淡的悲伤，隐隐的痛楚当初秋的风吹走了夏日的喧嚣烦躁，同时也带来了些许的凄凉。
失去了原本属于自己的东西，会让人感到痛苦，
所谓，No Gained, No Pain.
没有获得也就没有失去和痛苦而言。
然而，有些东西，虽然不曾属于我的，
但，心中却永远抱着憧憬之心。
幻想也好，期望也好，
当不可避免面对现实的时候，
本以为可以静如水的面对的心弦，却泛起了道道的涟漪。
平静的心也开始感到淡淡的悲伤，隐隐的痛楚。
仅以此文纪念此时此刻的感受，不知多年之后，再看到这几句话时时候可以重拾此种心情。 |
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